Designated Spaces

Life seems chaotic right now and everyone is on top of each other confined to a space that, until now, had a very specific purpose and routine. Now it needs to work as a life-space: work, family, school, dining and entertainment. Life needs designated spaces. The spaces you use for certain things need to change – it’s not just home right now, it’s LIFE.

• If you’re lucky enough to have a desk or additional table great. It’s now your office. The kitchen is now the coffee shop, so stop by, get your java on and then go to the office.
• Establish quiet zones (and more importantly, noise zones) during work hours. Kids need an outlet – give them the space for that away from where you’re trying to concentrate of have a virtual meeting.
• Do not work in your bedroom! We all hear about “Work-Life Balance” and the number one thing you can do for yourself is protect your sleep space. In times of stress, bringing your work concerns into the space where your brain needs to rest and make sense of the world creates noise.
• If your family usually eats at the kitchen table or around the TV, move every meal to the dining room and eat like a 1950’s family – no tech, no TV, just conversation and food.
• Today’s living room can arguably be called a Media Room. If you have the space, keep the tech and media in that space. The living room is now your entire entertainment space since other areas are designated to other pieces of our daily life.

Students Need Structure

While your kids might not be aware of it, they are conditioned to a time-bound routine during school. School bells ring and students have 5-10 minutes to switch gears. Setup a similar routine at home.

• Designate a breakfast time and a get to school on time schedule.
• Students may not realize it, but somewhere deep inside, they’re thinking, “Only 15 minutes left in this Math Class and then I get to go talk to my friends on the way to Science Class.”
• Give your kids a similar time-bound structure that allocates a certain amount of time per subject if you can.
• While the school day doesn’t last as long as your workday, you still need to keep them occupied while you work. Try allocating 45 minutes per subject with a 10-minute break between ‘classes’ where they are able to get up, walk around, check social media, etc.
• Once they go through all theirs subjects this way, look through their completions and see what they need to finish and start the cycle again for assignments they did not complete within the allotted time. This can act as the mental difference between classwork and homework.

Remember your Ergonomics

We’re all spending a lot of time sitting in front of a computer screen these days. While your company’s office may not have been decked out with the best of ergonomic furniture, it probably allowed you to get up and walk around more than the current situation does. Be mindful of that.

• If you’re on a phone call instead of a video conference, take the opportunity to get up and wander around. Think about how you would get up from your desk and walk to someone else’s desk for a quick conversation. Emulate that physical action as much as possible by simply pacing, taking notes while standing or even nailing a notepad to the wall at standing height and jot down notes in a different physical position.
• Wherever you setup your work space, take a good look at your posture. Are you sitting upright with no additional strain on your neck? Are your arms and elbows positioned anatomically for sustaining a typing position for hours?
• Even a meditation pillow and a coffee table can be setup as an ergonomic workstation. Meditation pillows are thicker and made for sitting for long period of time. An eight-inch meditation pillow and a coffee table can often provide the same proportions as a table and chair.
• Protect your eyes. There are lots of simple programs out there that can remind you to look away from the screen every 20 minutes or so. One of my favorites is Eye Leo. Install one of these and every time it pops up, do the exercise. Check your posture while you’re at it.

Have a YouTube Dance Party

So, the gym is closed… Never mind that you weren’t very committed to going anyway, but you need some exercise to build up your endorphins to combat stress.

• If you’re not disciplined enough to maintain a workout routine for the entire family, have a dance party.
• If you’re lucky enough to be able to que up any song from the internet and play it, gather your family and take turns choosing the next song. The only rule is that everyone must dance to every song. Even if it’s just swaying to a love song. Not only will you get moving, but you’ll end up learning something new about each of your family members and probably take a trip down memory lane yourself.
• If your family isn’t into that, turn to the traditional calisthenics that sustained our troops in the 1940’s – jumping jacks, pushups, stomach crunches, squats, toe touches, etc.

MBSR – Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction

Stress often comes from the anxiety of not knowing what will happen next. I think we can all relate to that stressor right now! So take a moment to just breath… Mediation has been proven time and time again (and again and again) to reduce stress. Something as small as a 5-minute breathing space every day can help.

• It’s not so much about the just sitting and breathing aspect of it. It’s about acknowledging how often your mind wanders to something in the past or future.
• My favorite guidance for focusing on the breath is three words: Seek, Find, Holding
  1. First you need to SEEK out your breath. It has a physical feeling in your body – maybe the feeling of cool air into your nose, the expansion of your rib cage on a inhale, or the retraction of your stomach on an exhale.
  2. Everyone feels differently so seek out that specific feeling and FIND your best one.
  3. Once you find the feeling of breath, focus on it. This is not holding your breath but HOLDING onto the feeling of each breath.
• Just focus on your breathing. In about 5 nanoseconds, your mind is going to wander and here comes the powerful part.
• Acknowledge and label the thought you are having and then let it go. For example, I’m still mad about something someone said to me yesterday. Now I need to label it: “Ruminating, that’s not this moment.” Or I’m worried because we’re down to the last few rolls of toilet paper and will need to react soon. Label it: “That’s planning, right now I’m breathing.”
• Return to SEEK, FIND, HOLD as many times as it takes to keep yourself focused on the present moment. Honestly, this is what even the best meditators do, over and over and over again.

Learn more about the proven practice of MBSR, developed by Jon Kabat-Zinn at UMass Memorial Medical Center et al.

Yell at Your Neighbors!

This pandemic is disruptive to our social lives but it’s not about ignoring people around you going through the same thing. It’s no surprise that the use of Social Media has spiked in the past few weeks. We should MAINTAIN PROTECTIVE DISTANCE while practicing the new social norms. So, yell at your neighbor!

• That 6-feet distance doesn’t logically seem as effective if you’re downwind from an infected cough, does it? But you can still have a friendly conversation from 30-40 feet away and get your social connections fulfilled.
• I’m not feeling ill and I take my temperature every morning and evening but I want to ease others’ anxiety as much as possible when I’m outside in my very friendly community so I exaggerate the distancing.
• If you walk your dog, run or bike your community, start giving others a very wide berth of 20 feet or more.  Try smiling and waving at every person you see. You may find you’re speaking louder to cover the distance but it can give you what you need for interactions right now.
• Of course, if you have any symptoms at all or have tested positive follow CDC guidelines and remain physically isolated at home.